Category

Success

Having The Universe on Your Side

Subscribe For Free On

About This Episode

Do you know what it takes to become an international award winning artist?

Today my guest Ed Roman, Award-winning singer/songwriter and performer from Ontario, Canada, shares how he creates great music by blurring the lines between pop, rock, folk, and country music genres. His songs have been played on over 600 stations worldwide and he’s won many awards (Indie Music Channel, 2018 Billboard Magazine Emerging Artist, 2017 Radio Music Award for Best Americana Artist, to name a few) for his work.

He speaks about;

  1. How being dyslexic was the start of his music career
  2. How to use a craft (such as music) as a spiritual experience of life
  3. How do cut through the background noise & negativity
  4. Leaving space to let the universe come through you, to create
  5. How to keep going even when the world doesn’t agree with you
  6. What it takes to master a craft that you’re passionate about
  7. How life experiences beyond a child’s world shape your creativity
  8. How the Universe put things in your way to help you get to your vision, that you didn’t even know was possible
  9. How to use your creativity for a goal bigger than yourself
  10. Shine more by committing yourself & believing in yourself
  11. How the people around you play a big part in your life to the better and the worse

Resources

Website – edroman.net

Follow on Facebook | Red Omen Video | Twitter

About The Guest

Singer, Songwriter and Performer

Ed Roman is an Award-winning singer/songwriter, performer and multi-instrumentalist from Shelburne, Ontario, Canada. Blurring the lines between pop, rock, folk, and country music genres, Ed’s uniquely crafted songs have received regular rotation on more than 100 terrestrial radio stations across North America and more than 600 stations, worldwide. Ed is a 2014 Artists Music Guild Award Nominee, a 2014 and 2018 International Music and Entertainment Association Award Winner, a two-time 2015 IMEA Award nominee, a 2015 and 2016 Josie Show Awards winner, an Akademia Awards Winner, and a two-time Indie Music Channel Award winner. Ed won a 2017 Radio Music Award for Best Americana Artist. He is a December 2018 Billboard Magazine Emerging Artist. The animated music video for the title track from his latest album, “Red Omen” has been shown at numerous film festivals around the globe. Ed is also a gentleman farmer, gardner and paranormal enthusiast.

5 Secrets The Super Successful Use To Smash Through Glass Ceilings And Catapult Their Career To The Top



A Second Chance At Life – Hollywood, Acting & Mental Wellbeing

Subscribe For Free On

About This Episode

Have you ever wondered what it takes to become a Hollywood star?

Today my guest, Eric Morris, One of the most recognized acting instructors in the world (launched several Hollywood careers including Jonny Depp, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jack Nicholson) joins me to shares his expertise about what makes good actors become great. He shares stories about;

1. How he ended up helping launch careers of stars like Jonny Depp, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jack Nicholson.
2. How acting can help overcome challenges, negative experiences & trauma faced by all human beings
3. The difference between stars who makes it in Hollywood and who don’t
4. Other surprising famous professionals that uses acting techniques to stand-out from the competition. (this was a big ah ha for me)
5. Untold stories about the journey it’s taken big stars to make it in a profession with a lot of uncertainty and no guarantees
6. What it takes to be successful in any craft in the long-run
7. The one quality that made Eric to become one of the best Acting teachers in the world
8. A different way to look at actors and acting as a profession that is different to the common believes that makes good actors great
9. How to use acting techniques to help change your self-image, confidence and relationships.
10. The one thing that Eric has done over the past 6 decades that’s kept him growing and on top.

Resources

Website – ericmorris.com

Follow on Youtube | Facebook

Book – A Second Chance At Life

About The Guest

Hollywood Acting Trainer, Author

One of the most recognized acting instructors in the world, Morris’ Career spans over sixty years with a series of eight books on the Eric Morris Acting System. As an actor, Morris has an accomplished portfolio of credits from stage, network television and major motion film. As a mentor, he has launched several Hollywood careers including Jonny Depp, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jack Nicholson.

Eric Morris has been teaching his unique acting system in Los Angeles, New York, and around the world for fifty-three years. His approach to acting is to teach actors “how not to act” but to become “professional experiencers.” While his techniques are solidly rooted in “the method” he has gone far beyond the original precepts of the Stanislavski system and so many of the practitioners of that approach. Eric has innovated a complete system that fulfills all the obligations of dramatic material. His system includes over three hundred exercises to liberate the actor to be “free to act.”

As an actor and instructor for almost sixty years, Eric has created hundreds of exercises and techniques designed to eliminate the obstacles, dependencies, traps, and habits that block the actor from functioning from an authentic, organic place. While developing his acting system, Morris discovered that his exercises can also benefit the participant’s mental health and well being.

In his 9th book “A Second Chance at Life Eric transforms his proprietary acting method into a therapeutic tool. By using the exercises in the book, readers can identify and repair their trauma, learn to express their emotions freely and enjoy a life of happiness and success.

5 Secrets The Super Successful Use To Smash Through Glass Ceilings And Catapult Their Career To The Top



Building a Law Firm Out of Law School

Subscribe For Free On

About This Episode

Do you wish you knew how to start a business straight out of university?

Today my guest is Branigan Robertson, an employment lawyer & entrepreneur. In an extremely competitive market, Branigan has built an online presence that generates thousands of potential clients each year, and he did all of this right out of Law school. He shares his advice, insights and fascinating stories about his clients in today episode. If you dare do things different to the norm, this is a must listen.

Some of the key points we cover are as follow;

1. How he built a Law firm straight out of Law School (which is unheard of!)
2. How being too smart sometimes can stop you from being excellent
3. How to think differently in a field that’s traditionally rigid
4. How to win in a competitive market where most can get the results clients desire
5. How to breakthrough the traditional industry rules and build a business/career that you love
6. How to build business assets that will pay back over and over again
7. How do you build a reputation from scratch when you don’t have experience
8. How to have the right systems working for you to achieve your goals
9. Difference in working on projects that you’re passionate about vs money makers
10. How to navigate through challenges in business that you don’t foresee coming

Resources

Website – brobertsonlaw.com | bardigitalmedia.com

Follow on Youtube | LinkedIn

Contact – Email

Other Resources Mentioned – Atomic Habits by James Clear | Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod

About The Guest

Employment Lawyer & Entrepreneur

In an extremely competitive market, Branigan has built an online presence that generates thousands of potential clients each year. Mr. Robertson has built a business that fits into his lifestyle, rather than being a slave to his work. As a result, he gets to spend time with his family that most lawyers only dream about.

5 Secrets The Super Successful Use To Smash Through Glass Ceilings And Catapult Their Career To The Top



Little Known Strategy to Increase Sales Without Working Harder

Subscribe For Free On

About This Episode

How would you like to increase your impact without having to work more?

Today My guest is Josh Kelly, Co-Founder of RevuKangaroo, the world’s leading reputation management system, that has helped generate countless reviews for businesses. He shares his expertise in making a bigger impact with your business without having to spend any more time or effort. He shares;

1. How Josh took his local family business from $7 million in revenue to over $100 million
2. Steps to taking a simple idea and building a big brand
3. The link between online Reviews & ROI
4. How to increase business growth without ‘working’ more
5. How to create a high performing culture with customer reviews
6. How to turn negative reviews around and use it to your advantage
7. Do’s & Don’t in creating a successful brand
8. How to change the marketing approach for a Blue Ocean product
9. How to succeed with a new product when you haven’t built a reputation in the market
10. How to find the right mentors that would push you forward

Listen, subscribe and share now…….

Resources

Website – revukangaroo.com

Follow on RevuKangaroo Facebook | Josh’s Facebook | LinkedIn

Contact – Email | +1 6024568832

About The Guest

Co-Founder, RevuKangaroo

Josh Kelly is the Co-Founder of RevuKangaroo, the world’s leading reputation management system, an automated SAAS business that has helped generate countless reviews for businesses on places like Google, Yelp, Facebook and more as well as growing actual revenue for clients, sometimes in the tens of millions of dollars.
Before devoting his work fulltime to RevuKangaroo, Josh had an extensive background in marketing, working at companies like Bonneville International, Parker and Sons, Dial America and eventually starting his own marketing firms- Diversified Marketing Group (DMG) Inc and Clover Marketing.
He helped his own family business, a local heating, cooling and plumbing company in Phoenix, grow from $7 million in revenue to over $100 million in just 14 years and he has been featured on stages with the Zig Zigler Foundation, Dave Yoho and EGIA as well as major platforms like CBS, Fox and NBC.
Josh currently lives in Phoenix but works around the world.

Music Credit

Music by: Senbei
Song: It Was All in Your Mind

5 Secrets The Super Successful Use To Smash Through Glass Ceilings And Catapult Their Career To The Top



5 Steps to Building a Business that Will Grow Even While You Sleep

If you accidently came to this article thinking about ‘how to make money while you sleep’, you’re definitely in the wrong place. Hit exit right now.

 

This post is for business owners & consultant who dream of having a business that will not fall apart when they’re not working in the business. That will thrive even when you go on holidays. Building a business that will not burn into flames if you’re sick and can’t get out of bed and that will grow even when you feel like you’re not working so much.

 

Over the years, in many different shapes and forms, my job had been to help business owners/leadership teams to build high performing businesses, teams and help individuals become high performers. And while doing that I’ve identified 5 steps that’s crucial to have in place if you dream of having a business that you can really enjoy and not feel like you’d lose it all if you don’t work 100 hours a week.

  1. Client Centric Product Development

This is such a simple point that a lot of businesses and entrepreneurs get so wrong, just because they don’t understand the fundamentals in any successful business. Any business that had become a mammoth of legacy has one thing that was crucial to their success.

Found a problem that already exist in the world (that people are willing to pay money for) and they solved it. Period.

I see so many wannabe entrepreneurs getting so confused with marketing, advertising, the latest tips and tricks of the trade, but missing this point!

When you don’t have a product that solves an existing problem, of course you have to go above and beyond to figure how to sell it. But if you start with your clients (not customers! There’s a difference!) in mind, you don’t need to spend so much time “trying” to market, because it sells itself.

One of the top 5 reasons why businesses go out of business in the first 5 years in business is because there is no need for the product. But just because the founder had a solution that he/she thought, would be a good one to push down people’s throats, just because it was their ‘opinion’.

If you’re thinking ‘Well…I don’t know a problem I can solve!’…well then you have some ground work to do!

Go find a group of people you’re passionate about helping and ask them what their problems are and then solve it for them. If you don’t know how to solve it, well…… learn! Stop guessing, get out there and ask!

 

2. Stick to your Zone of Genius

This one, I’ve been guilty of myself as well. But, there’s no single human being on this earth who are born to do everything in this world 100% to it’s best. Even if you try, you’re going to find out the hard way that you’re really not as smart as you think you are.

It’s like you trying to be the goalkeeper, mid field, centre, and all other positions as well as be the coach in a football team. And expecting to win!

You can only be great at one thing at best. If you try to be everything, you’re going to get burnt out and 99% of the time you’d do a pretty average job at everything.

The earlier you admit the fact that you’re not really as smart as you think you’re, business will be easy.

Find out what your zone of genius is, and stick to it.

Find people who are smarter than you are in all other areas.

Yes, even when you don’t have money! Especially when you don’t have money, because that’s when you need people around you to tell you what you don’t know.

If you look at some of the most successful sports teams you’d notice cases where either the coach, the manager or the players in the team has taken a pay cut in order to afford another best player for a position they are not good at. Because in the long run, it’s going to pay off. Business is a team sport. Treat it as such and you will win.

You only know what you know and you don’t know what you don’t know. Which takes me to my next point.

 

3. Build a Team That Would Shift Mountains

This is a point that gets on a lot of smart people’s nerves. Especially people who come from very successful corporate backgrounds where they you’re rewarded to be the best and be all to everyone. Unfortunately, if you do this in the business world, the chances the business would fail is high.

The faster you admit that you’re not the smartest and the best in everything, you’ll enjoy the process more

and you can build a team who is smarter than you are, in doing the things that you’re not great at.

One part of this comes down to letting go of wanting to micro manage or be in control, just because you feel insecure about not knowing the ins and and outs of something. If you do want to know everything, keep tabs on everything,  know what everyone is doing at every given second, I’ve got some news for you! Business doesn’t suit you. Please go back to a job where you can micro manage every bit of detail. Because that’s a difficult way to build a business.

A lot of business owners who have a hard time letting go pieces to people who are truly talented would only grow to a limited extent. The only thing it’s going to do is drive great people away. Because no one wants to be micromanaged.

So stop being pedantic, hire the best, keep the best and let go when it’s no longer a mutually beneficial relationship. And when you have your A team around you, you will grow leaps and bounds compared to how slow you grow on your own. If your concern is that you don’t have money to hire the best, well, find the money or be creative in engaging the right talent.

 

4. Build a Culture that people would do anything to work for you

If you have a high turnover, it’s a good indicator about the culture you’ve built. Whether you’ve built one on purpose or not, you’re still building one. This ties back to the point about keeping the best.

Hiring the best is easy, but keeping them is hard. If people leadership is not your strong suit, hire one who’s great at. People join companies because they believe in the vision, but they leave people because you’ve made it difficult for them to thrive.

You don’t even need big manifestos to build a great culture. Just build you A team and ask them what they want their culture to be. Let them build a place that they love waking up everyday to come to work for. Stop guessing what they want and ask them.

Let them become the champions of their own culture.

Something that a lot of businesses do not understand is the difference between building a high performing creative team and high performing non-creative team. If you try to measure success and manage talent in non-creative fields the same way as you’d measure and lead creative teams, I will guarantee you, it will fail.

They use different cognitive functions in their brain to do the work and you understanding this difference can be the determining factor in having a high performing, driven, passionate team that will be your competitive edge and losing great talent and being miserable having to do all the work yourself.

Build a culture where everyone has the autonomy to be their best and you’d have a much fun time building the business.

 

5. Build the framework for people to thrive

‘My team doesn’t operate when I’m not there…..’

‘She didn’t do what I expected…’

‘He’s not delivered as much as I’d like..’

 

These are phrases that I’ve heard time and time again from business owners.

The reason why your team doesn’t deliver what you wanted them to is because of two reasons.

 

  • You have poor or no communication

 

I cannot even remember the number of times that I’ve had to deliver the tough news that the reason why your team is not performing is because of ‘you’!

“The meaning of your communication is the response you get.” - Gregory Bateson

It’s not your team’s responsibility to go above and beyond to understand what you’re saying or read your mind. It’s your responsibility to be clear about your intentions.

 

  • You haven’t put the right system in place for them to deliver

If you have performance related issues, that’s simply because you have either got no systems in place or you haven’t got the right system in place for your team to thrive. When you have the right system in place, sooner rather than later, people who cannot keep up with you will leave. And that’s not a loss. That’s merely a relationship that’s not meant to be.

But when you don’t have the right systems in place, you would have low performing employees and you wouldn’t even know about it. All you would see are the symptoms of the problem like working longer hours, missing deadlines, always putting out fires, etc.

 

While I can write a book about these topics, I will leave it at this leave, as this gives a good start for you to start the diagnosis of problems you face and start asking the right questions.

V.



3 Signs to Indicate You’ve Forgotten You’re HUMAN



This is a different kind of a post to the ones I normally do, but I felt that it was time.

As a Coach, I speak with various types of people and every now and then, I recognize patterns in the challenges they face. And some of them are very human challenges that we treat them as different. So today….. I want to dedicate this post to speaking about some of those challenges so that if you face any of them, you’d have a different perspective of them

1. Stressing about being stuck

If you’ve never felt stuck in something….you’re one of the rare lucky ones. As for the majority of us….commonly we feel stuck in different situations and areas of life every now and then.

And when we do…it’s also common to stress about the fact that we’re stuck. Try to “figure it out”, sit on a therapy chair talking about it for years, meditate on it, sleep on it, lose sleep over it, etc.

But getting stuck every now and then is in our very human nature.

Think of a stick stuck while floating in a river. You might notice that it’s stayed stuck for probably a few hours or days even….but take a step back and you’d see things differently.

When you take a step back you’d see that all sticks will float for a bit….and then get stuck in a corner. Sometimes for minutes…sometimes for hours….sometimes for months. But eventually, it will get a slight nudge from somewhere and it will start to flow again. It would get stuck again…at a different spot…but eventually it will get unstuck and forget all about it.

And it does that hundreds of times…!

We humans are like that as well. Sometimes we’re in flow with life (and we’re happy about it because we’ve been told that, that’s the way to be) and then sometimes we get stuck and then we become unhappy about the fact we’re stuck and stress about it. Because we’ve been told that it’s bad to be stuck. That there’s something wrong with you for staying stuck that long!!!

When you take a few steps back from your life, you’ll realise that you’ve done this your entire life. First day at school, first crush, first heartbreak, uni drama, first job, first real relationship….and the list goes on.

The only thing you didn’t know about  is….how long you’d stay stuck, at what point you would get stuck again and how exactly you’d get unstuck (e.g. a new opportunity that came by, a person you met, conversation with a mentor/coach, a change in your external environment, etc).

But you just did!

Whenever you feel stuck with something...a bigger opportunity is unfolding in the background that’s not ready for you yet.

But because you’re so close to it, you just can’t see it. But when you look back after many years ….you’d realise why you were stuck at that exact point. What good came out of it as a result.

The moment you get stressed about the fact that you’re stuck…..remember it’s the human nature and you’d get unstuck at any moment as you’ve done many times throughout your life. So stop stressing about trying to “figure out” how to get unstuck!

If you ‘know how’ to do it, you would’ve already done it by now!

It’ll happen when it happens.

2. Expecting to Have THE Perfect Relationship with Kids

Have you ever met anyone who hadn’t had challenges with their parents at one stage or another?

Have you met parents who’ve never had challenges with their kids at one stage or another?

What makes you think that you can become a parent who never had any problems with your children? And there’s something wrong with you if you don’t?

This is a fantasy that a lot of parents have, to become the perfect parents who never had any problems with their kids, ever!

If I speak with your parents or whoever was looking after you growing up, you know what kind of a report card I would get about you, right?

Yet, they were doing exactly what you’re trying to do! Trying to do the best, to the best of their ability with what they had. So if your kids are going through a phase of being stubborn, hating you, rebellious & hurtful……just know that they’re just going through a phase. It too shall pass just like it did for you!

Sometimes...you can help them and sometimes all you can do is to be there for support and let them know how much they’re loved.

And the rest will fall into place.

So please stop beating yourself up thinking you’re doing a bad job, unless you can find a parent who’s never had ANY problems with their kids EVER!

You’re merely being human.

Note: If you DO find a parent who’ve never had ANY problems with their kids (and the kids turned out to be great), I would like to be the first one to know about them.

3. Being scared to feel scared

‘How do I get rid of my fears entirely so that I can go out and be my best self?’

This is a question that I get asked ALOT. And I’ve got some good news and bad news!

Bad news is….YOU CANNOT!

Good news is……I can show you how to TURN FEAR INTO AN ASSET!

We all have fear at some level or another for different things, people and situations. But unfortunately, fear is a commonly misunderstood feeling just because we give the wrong meaning to it.

The reason why you’re alive today…is because of FEAR.

Think about it this way…..imagine your ancestors thousands and thousands of years ago…..during hunter gatherer period…when they had to deal with a lot of dangerous circumstances; they survived because of fear!

Anyone who didn’t feel fear enough….got wiped out of this earth. So the mere reason why you’re born today is because your ancestors had enough fear in them to survive. It’s inbuilt to our human nature.

Wanting to get rid of fear is like wanting to get rid of your own shadow!

It ain’t going to happen!

However, you can use fear as a compass. I’ve written a dedicated article on how to do exactly that, hence I’m not going to repeat.

You just don’t have to get scared of feeling fear! It’s just another feeling like ‘happiness’!

Do you worry when you feel happy? If the answer is no, treat ‘fear’ the same!

The next time you feel fear when reaching out to someone big, making a presentation, speaking publicly, going for an interview/negotiation, or whatever else you fill your life with…

Good! It means that you’re about to do something great!

Feel the fear and do it anyway! Because that too shall pass!

Wanting to get rid of it means that you’ve forgotten you’re human.

And ….if you don’t know this already….

In life some of the things you do will work out...and some of it won’t.

Now If you think…. ”I know that Vindya! Duh!!”

Well…do you? Because if you did, you wouldn’t be going at everything in life as if it’s a matter of life and death! Would you?

It may sound stupid! But it’s a simple truth in life that we all forget.

*****Ok…I know I said 3 Signs…but I had to write this one too

4. Expecting to be an exception to the rule because you’re serving a higher purpose

How many instances have you seen a person being rewarded not necessarily because they’re the best at what they do, but because they put themselves out there more?

Or a person with average talent make a bucket load of money, while people with greater gifts are just scraping by?

How many times have you failed to convince a point…regardless of how great your work is?

I hear a lot of people who do creative work/entrepreneurs who do what they do because they’re on a mission…..get surprised about the fact that they’re not served a better hand in life just because they’re doing work that’s for the greater good.

Another truth of life is that you cannot escape hard work, proactively marketing your vision, making sales, making money, principles of business, social norms….just because you’re creating something great.

They’re things that’s equal to all human beings regardless of what you do.

Just because you’re a good person, doesn’t mean that other people are going to automatically discover your greatness and reward you for it

Or money is going to flow through the door…or you can get away with slacking off and not put in the work necessary to get the results!….or the deals are going to magically appear without you having to lift a finger.

It’s a truth of life that each and everyone of us have to do our part before the universe starts to reward you for it

regardless of your gender, age, race or religion.

This is why you see people with lesser talents move forward and you’re left wondering why not me! Rather than understanding what part you need to play…you’ve spent your time complaining about how the system doesn’t work..or how the society is bad..

Again….defying this as a truth of life….is again forgetting that you’re a human living in a human world.

———–

I hope this made some sense and gave a different perspective even in the slightest possible way.

Sincerely,

V.

How Ordinary People Can Do Extraordinary Things!



If you dream of doing extraordinary things but every now and then, you ask the question “Who Do I Think I Am?”…don’t worry…..it’s perfectly normal.

So today, I want to share with you a podcast I did recently with April Seifert on her  great Podcast Women Inspired.

In our conversation we talk about;

  • How we underestimate ourselves & what we are capable of achieving
  • The impact of other people’s words on our own ability to set and achieve goals
  • Imposter syndrome and HOW TO TAME IT!
  • Practical tips for playing bigger

Have a listen and comment below.

What has been your biggest insight from this episode?

Love,

V.

How Successful People Jump Leaps & Bounds Before You Know It

Hi!

I'm Vindya.

You know that you are meant to be doing something much bigger than you do now. You are even scared to say it out loud because no one would understand. Well, bring in your biggest dreams and your biggest fears and I will help you get there faster than you ever thought possible.

Time and time again I come across very smart people who would like to take their current role in their career to the next stage or double the income in their business, take on more responsibility, make a bigger impact, get more recognition, make more money …..you name it.

Most people come to me with very rigid lines in their mind about who they are, what they can and can’t do. And some of them even tell me that their challenge is that they need to be able to communicate better, write better emails, have more confidence, network more…and the list goes on.

As if they knew for sure that if they ‘did’ something different, they would have everything that they don’t have. Or if they stopped ‘doing’ some things, the challenges they are facing would go away.

And then they would be happier, have better people around them, be less stressed, take more vacations, make more money, make a bigger impact, etc.

So, the moment that they feel like something is missing their first idea is to upskill, do another course, a certification, a degree, work faster, work better, be more ‘productive’, manage time better, learn ‘persuasion’, “Win friends and influence people”, etc.

But very few people stop to ask themselves the question……

” What if I don’t have to ‘DO’ anything different?….”

“What if I’m not missing anything?”

“What if it’s about doing exactly the opposite of what I’ve been ‘DOING’ all this time….”

In fact…

What if it’s got less to do with doing…and more to do with how you are BEING?

Ahhhhhh……………

Yes…..

BEING!!!

What if it’s not another skills you need to pick or a course you need to do, another seminar that you have to go to….

But what if…just by shifting who you are being…..you challenges would go away….?

Everything that you want that you don’t have…would appear in front of you….

Everything that you don’t want to have in your life…..would just disappear like magic….

And every problem that you think you feel stuck in….would become unstuck…

Just…….what if?

This has been the basis of my work since I started my profession (sure… the skills, the tactics and the strategies play a part in it) and the very moment somebody realise this, their whole world changes.

But you have to be willing to open your eyes and look at the world from a different lens. And stop making excuses for the lens you are already wearing.

Because everything that you have in your life is because of the way you’re being right now. And everything that you don’t want in your life, is because you’re being in a way of attracting them.

So, before you think of taking another course, start another degree, or a certification….ask yourself….

What challenges do I wish would go away?

What goals have I been struggling to get to?

How am I being around these challenges?

Is it time to change the lens?



Now, I would love to hear from you:

What is one insight that changed everything for you from this article?

And what is one tiny action you are going to take as a result of that insight?

Use the comment box down below and share as much detail as possible in your reply as your story may help someone else have an even greater insight.

Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to be here.

Sincerely,

V.

P.S. Since it’s coming to the end of January 2019 already, if you still feel like you haven’t set yourself up to win, come join me and our community of extraordinary High Performers and let’s make this year an amazing one.

Got a difficult boss to deal with or a tough person to manage?

Since the industrial age, books had been written, trainings have been created and courses have been held on handling difficult people. Specially in the corporate set-up. There are lots of techniques among these that work to a great extent. However, I’ve heard of many cases and I personally know myself that none of these tactics have worked.

 

And 99% of the time it’s because of something that cannot be explained by logic, strategies and tactics. Yet, very few know about it.  The people who are aware of this are very successful at dealing with difficult, sensitive situations as well as have great awareness of themselves.

 

The reason why this cannot be explained using logic is because the root cause lies at a human level.

So let me tell you a story…

 

Once upon a time ago…in a far far away land…(just kidding)

 

Story 1

 

Once a highly talented professional came to me asking for help with his work. He felt like calling in sick every morning all because of one person: his manager… In his words ‘I feel like quitting everyday. I hate when she micromanages, it just drives me crazy. I think it’s time I quit’.

 

I’m sure we’ve all felt like this at one stage or another. While I felt for him putting up with this for 8 hours/day, 5 days a week, I needed to find out exactly what was happening. So through our conversation I found out she was keeping her fingers in the pie, at all times, just to meet her deadlines.

 

Unhealthy management style? Sure… But this was not the issue here. The issue lies in how he felt when she did this. And when I dug a little deeper I discovered the way his manager was acting made him feel untrustworthy, controlled and micro managed.

 

Something interesting about this professional was freedom was one of his highest values and her behaviour was triggering emotions from his childhood of not trustworthy, controlled and deep down feeling not good enough. So when he’d see her at work, he’d be angry, frustrated and anxious.

 

Maybe the manager was acting wrong, but regardless, the emotions being triggered had nothing to do with her. And the very moment he came to understand this, he became self-aware enough to create a strategy to deal with it.

 

Story 2

 

An Executive level manager once came to me with to complain about how a subordinate of his was super difficult to manage. He said he tried everything in the textbook and nothing seem to work!

 

The Executive manager was even considering letting her go because she’d been ‘told’ many times and still no improvement.

 

When I dug deeper (as I do!) it was clear the subordinate was not necessarily acting disrespectfully, but rather some of the things she did (for whatever the reason) the Executive was giving it the meaning ‘disrespectful’.

 

And not surprisingly….this wasn’t the first time someone had been acting this way…

 

It turned out, this subordinate’s behaviour was triggering a memory of people from his childhood! (crazy, right?)

 

And what was happening was, because this being a sensitive spot for the Executive, everytime someone behaved even remotely close to the behaviour he saw as a child, it brings back all the negative emotions he felt when he was a child.

 

Hence, ‘that person is disrespectful’!

 

—–

 

So what’s the point?

 

When we interact with other, even for a brief moment, we filter a lot of information we see, hear and feel through our past experiences, a lot even from childhood. And as a result, a lot of emotions get triggered even when they have no relevance.

 

Unless you are a very self aware person and have dealt with all of the baggage from the past (regardless how perfect you think your childhood was) it’s very easy to miss this.

 

‘So what do I do about this Vindya?’…

 

Well….have you encountered the same kind of scenario with different people from different teams or companies in the past? Think of a person you’ve had difficulty dealing with…

 

How do they make you feel?

What do they do to make you feel that way?

Are there patterns in behaviour?

Who from your past gave you the same negative feelings?

 

Please note that for you to do this, you have really dig deep into your psyche. I may make it sound easy as I’ve been doing what I do for years.

 

Some of the most mysterious cases gets resolved this way. While all tactics you’ve learned will make you a great professional, being aware of the emotional side would move you leaps and bounds.

 

So here’s the challenge I would like to leave you with…

 

What relationship do you have at work, in your business or at home, do you wish was easier?

 

And if you do change things around, how would that change things for you?

 

XOXO,

V.

P.S. If you’d like to know more, download free book ‘5 Secrets The Super Successful Use To Smash Through Glass Ceilings And Catapult Their Career To The Top’.

How to make FEAR Your Weapon

Is there a project/idea that you’ve been craving to take on?
But you never got started with it…

Maybe the time was never right.
Maybe there wasn’t enough money.
Maybe you never found the courage to move forward with it

Or maybe when you think of starting, you ask the question…

‘Who do you think you are to be dreaming of doing something so big…..when you are not even good enough to be doing what you’re doing now’

Each and every one of us has asked this from yourself at one stage or another….

And most people would take it to heart and stop….

Stop dreaming.
Stop growing.
They stay put.
Stay mediocre.
Stay invisible.
Continue to be comfortable…

…so you don’t get hurt if you fail!

But the few who understand these thoughts are actually normal… are the ones who make the impossible happen….

———

First of… if you’ve had these thoughts, the only thing it means is that you’re human!

As humans, biologically we’re wired to feel fear when we’re in danger!

It’s good!
It’s normal!
It keeps us safe!

Unfortunately….the part where we get tricked is when our subconscious has a hard time differentiating real danger (like a tiger in your room) to a made up fear (like speaking in front of an audience).

So the very moment you try to do something different….
Something out of the ordinary….
Something that makes your heart sing although it makes no logical sense….

Your subconscious kicks in the same danger response because it’s wired itself to believe that ‘new’ = danger!
.
But in actual fact it just wants you to be safe….

Safe from getting hurt (that you may not feel)…
Safe from failure (that might not happen)…
Safe from the humiliation (you most likely will not face)…
.
So we make a decision to become the person who never tried….
Because if you don’t try, you’d will definitely fail.
.
I can also guarantee you that you would NEVER know what you could become either!
.
The difference between a person who does extraordinary things and the person who’s ordinary, is that the person who’s extraordinary understands the fear, acknowledged it…
And sent it aside as just a thought in their mind….
Nothing more…nothing less….
.
Fear is often the greatest indicator of something amazing you want to create, become or do…

The question is: which way will you use it…
.
Would you use is as a security blanket….
Or would you use it as a weapon to move forward?

XO,

V.

P.S. If this is the year you’re going to use your fear as your weapon – in a community of talented high performers – then Click Here.